Wedding Ideas

The Best Marriage Advice We’ve Ever Read

Posted on August 26, 2016 by New Jersey Bride

The best marriage advice.
Photo: Carly Rae Hobbins on Unsplash

We’re always in search of the best planning, wedding and relationship advice. So when we stumbled upon this blog this week from Dave Willis, we knew that this was great marriage advice. Dave Willis is one of the most popular relationship bloggers, the founder of strongermarriages.org with his wife Ashley, and a pastor in Augusta, Georgia. He’s acquired these tips during his 15-year marriage, and we love that they’re simple, practical, straight-forward and ring true! Give them a read and discuss with your fiancé as you’re getting closer and closer to your wedding.

1. A strong marriage requires two people who choose to love each other even on days when they struggle to like each other.

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2. Always answer your phone when your spouse is calling and try to stay off your phone when you are together with your spouse.

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3. The happiest marriages have two spouses who both consistently and deliberately put the needs of the other ahead of their own needs.

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4. Surround yourself with people who strengthen your character, and remove yourself form people who compromise  your character.

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5. Your marriage is more important than whatever is stressing you our, so don’t take your stress out on each other.

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[RELATED: 5 Tips for Managing Stress (and Finding Joy) While Planning Your NJ Wedding]

6. In every disagreement with your spouse, remember that there is a not a winner and a loser. You are united in everything, you you will either win together or lose together. Work together to find a solution where you both win. 

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7. A strong marriage rarely has two strong people at the same time. It is a husband and wife who take turns being strong for each other in the moments when the other feels weak.

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8. It takes more than sex to build a great marriage, but it is nearly impossible to build a great marriage without out!

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9. Marriage not 50-50; divorce is 50-50. Married has to be 100-100. It’s not splitting everything in half, but giving everything you’ve got!

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RELATED: Mike ‘The Situation’ Sorrentino and Wife Lauren Reflect On Their Jersey Wedding 5 Years Later]

10. Always strive to give your spouse the very best of yourself; not what’s left over after you have given your best to everyone else.

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11. Your words to your spouse matter, but the tone in which you speak those words matters just as much.

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12. Your children are learning about marriage by watching you. Treat your spouse the way you want your children’s future spouses to treat them someday.

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13. Never keep secrets from each other. Secrecy is the enemy of intimacy. 

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14. A painful truth is always better than a hidden lie.

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15. A real apology requires…1) freely admitting fault. 2) fully accepting responsibility. 3)humbly asking for forgiveness. 4) immediately changing behavior. 5) actively rebuilding trust. 

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16. Holding a grudge doesn’t make you strong; it makes you bitter. Forgiving doesn’t make you weak; it sets you free. 

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17. Real love is when you are completely committed to someone even when they are being completely unlovable. 

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18. Don’t just be physically monogamous; be mentally monogamous as well. True intimacy begins in the heart and the mind; not in the bedroom. 

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19. Be an encourager. The world has plenty of critics already. 

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20. Being frustrated withy our spouse isn’t a good reason to get divorce anymore than being frustrated with your children is a good reason to put them up for adoption. 

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21. Wear your wedding wing. It’s not just jewelry. It’s a symbol that reminds that world that you are off-limits and can also remind you to consider your spouse in every decision you make. 

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22. The strongest marriages are built on a foundation of shared faith. The more you love God, the more capacity you will have to truly love each other. 

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23. Instead of nagging about your spouse, try bragging about your spouse. Build them up, don’t tear them down. Focus on what they are doing right instead of always pointing out what they are doing wrong. 

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24. Problems in marriage are never solves by blaming each other. They are only solved by working together to find solutions. 

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25. Never stop flirting with your spouse, and never start flirting with anyone else!

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[RELATED: On Their Wedding Day, These NJ High School Sweethearts Took Photos at Their Alma Mater]

26. Your spouse is not a mindreader. Don’t expect them to know what you’re thinking and feeling if you have not clearly communicated it. 

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27. A husband and wife must function like two wings on the same bird. They must work together or the marriage will never get off the ground. 

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28. Love your spouse more than you love your career, hobbies and money. That other stuff can’t love you back.

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29. Consider your spouse in every decision you make, because every decision you make will impact them in some way. 

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30. Lifelong love isn’t a result of feelings, luck, or even compatibility. It is a result of commitment. 

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