While speaking with a premier New Jersey floral designer, I was captivated by her stories about the painstaking effort thatRead More
You did WHAT?!
Have you ever been barefoot and locked out of your own home because you were so excited that your wedding invitations finally arrived by UPS, or maybe you keep writing your wedding year on everything that actually requires the current year, like checks for example. Or maybe you left the trunk of your car open to get wedding supplies out and you totally forgot to shut it and your fiancé found it wide open in the middle of the driveway in the pouring rain. Well, if you haven’t experienced this lovely phenomenon, just wait. It will happen out of nowhere and when you least expect it, BOOM Bridal Brain!
A big joke
The first couple bridal brain moments I had really didn’t register. (Speaking of register, I have to finish my bridal registry!) As I digress, I noticed these “special moments” arriving more and more frequently. I would joke with my friends, including my maid of honor who was pregnant at the time, that I had pregnancy brain for brides. I can only imagine what kind of mess I’ll become during an actual pregnancy. This forgetfulness is happening due to the results of the overwhelming amount of tasks involved in planning and preparing for a wedding. The craziest part about Bridal Brain is that no one is immune. I feel like it’s a virus, it attacks its host and shows signs and symptoms. Then once items on the Wedding To-Do List get checked off and you drink a glass of wine or two, you’re able to make a full recovery.
I am a health educator, so naturally my Bridal Brain intrigues me enough to do more research. I figured it was a common occurrence among many overwhelmed and overworked brides-to-be. After exploring online, I actually found research that explains it in more detail along with many other brides that suffered from it. AT LAST, I AM NOT ALONE!
There is great satisfaction and a bit of relief knowing that this silly little problem is so common among many brides and grooms, too.
Now the question remains, how can I help myself? Is there a 12-step program but for Bridal Brain? “Hello, ‘insert your name here’ , welcome to Bridal Brain Anonymous. Please tell the group what you did today and how you feel about it.”
The answer is yes, there is help. There are many resources to manage your wedding planning and preparing without the constant occurrence of the Bridal Brain moment. I can’t say that these tips will completely eliminate your Bridal Brain moments, but it’s definitely worth a try.
1. There is no physical support group that meets every Tuesday with a 12-step program, but New Jersey Bride does offer an amazing support group that is completely private on Facebook. It is as simple as joining the group on their Facebook page and answering a few short questions. The women on there—along with New Jersey Bride editors Molly and Ally—are extremely supportive and filled with amazing ideas and information, along with an occasional wedding store discount coupon for dresses and invitations.
2. Make a list! A lot of lists…and check them off as you complete tasks. By the way, there is nothing wrong with a million sticky notes all over your desk or refrigerator despite what others may think. Do what works for you, after all you know yourself best.
3. Create a spreadsheet using Google or Excel. #LifeSaver
4. Take a brain break from planning and preparing. Your mind and body will thank you.
5. Due to the fact that I’m a health educator, I’m constantly promoting healthy lifestyles. Remember, above all your tedious wedding planning and preparing, take care of yourself. Eating healthy, drinking plenty of water, and exercising daily are key components to healthy living.
The happy ever after
Remember Bridal Brain is here to stay—until your wedding day! It’s all about self-help, supportive friends and family, and helpful resources from NJ Bride. Congratulations to all the couples out there. Happy wedding to all and all a good life!
About Elise: Elise Tooker, born and raised in Sussex County, is a health and physical education teacher and swim team coach—and a New Jersey bride who now lives in Warren County. She’ll be marrying Daniel Krok at The Mansion at Mountain Lakes on April 12, 2019. “Daniel and I are into healthy living/fitness, so naturally we met at our hometown gym,” Elise says. “I totally started up a conversation first, but there has always been a debate about that!”