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Kaity and John at Fiddler’s Elbow Country Club

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Kaity and John at Fiddler’s Elbow Country Club

Posted on September 15, 2021 by Allison Dupree

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How did you meet?
We both grew up in Berkeley Heights and attended Columbia Middle School and Governor Livingston High School together. Despite not being friends (mainly because one of us may have been a troublemaker), it was not until sophomore year of high school that we shared our first kiss which was never spoken of again. We briefly spoke at a high school reunion years later, mainly for John to ask me to do his taxes for him. I said no.

Fast forward to the fall of 2017 when John was shopping at Bed Bath and Beyond for window blinds (This still shocks me to this day that he would willingly go to that store by himself). John first saw me speed walking into the store as I was on a mission to find fruit fly traps to save my apartment from destruction. After being told by the store staff that they in fact were out of fruit fly traps, I heard my name being called from behind. It was John. After some small talk, and John asking me to do his taxes for the 100th time, we both left the store and went our separate ways. John followed up with me on Facebook Messenger to ask for my number later that day. And the rest is history…

How did you get engaged?
It was a few days after my birthday in August when John finally popped the question at the scenic overlook in Watchung. Unbeknownst to me, John’s brother, Dave was hiding with his camera to document the moment. Then we had a beautiful celebratory dinner at Andre’s lakeside restaurant in Sparta.

Details of the day!
We didn’t necessarily have a specific theme. We started with our color palette which included pale pinks, mauve, burgundy, and ivory with greenery throughout. I let Peonies to Paint Chips really drive the bus in terms of flowers, I guided them in saying I wanted everything to look lush and an elegant garden party. One of the top comments we received was how many flowers were everywhere. It was important to me that as many flowers were taken home by guests as possible so we had the arrangements in take-home containers. I think by the end of the reception I was shoving flowers into the departing guest’s hands. We also didn’t want anything that was screaming fall – but still made note of the fact that it was October by sneaking in some pumpkin-themed items.

My talented mother made all four flower girl dresses/hairbows and the ring bearers’ bow ties and vests. I wanted them to look like a troupe of angels similar to Princess Charlotte and her brothers and boy did she deliver! I think it’s really the exception to have 9 children in a bridal party and they certainly left us giggling and awing over them. She also made me a jacket and belt from her mother’s wedding dress. It was stunning. Also included in my dress was a bow made from my other grandmother’s lace dressing gown which was hidden in the third layer of tulle.

We had signature drink signs and a wedding sign both ordered from Etsy. I made the table numbers, escort cards, favor signs, filled hand sanitizers, and labeled bottles, and other random things. I made about 10 loaves of homemade pumpkin bread as our favor. My husband and I love the recipe and mutually agreed that we didn’t want to pay for something that would eventually get thrown out. My husband, who is a steel fabricator, also made a piece of metal artwork with our initials for the escort table. My biggest take-home was that if I was going to make or pay for anything – I wanted to be able to include it in my house as a piece of decoration. And I’m happy to report 94% of it is in fact displayed. I may have gone a little overboard on DIY but it will be fun to look back at one day to talk about how crazy I was trying to throw this all together in 7 weeks. On the ballroom tables, each child had either a coloring pad or received a new Nintendo Switch game to keep them happy. Our bridal party room included multiple tote bags filled with toys, games, and baby stuffed animals for the little girls. When I dropped off all the items the day before, I felt like I was Santa! But there wasn’t a tear dropped by any child because they had more than enough to keep them entertained.

My husband, who now is an active participant at all Fiddler’s Elbow cigar nights, had a cigar bar on the patio with a humidor filled with cigars selected by his best man. Every time I lost him during the night, I found him out there. During the reception, we had the staff play Happy Birthday, and my husband and I brought out three 9 inch birthday cakes that Chef made for us! We actually were married on my sister-in-law’s birthday, and my maid of honor’s birthday was the day before, and one of my brothers had a birthday the day after. Needless to say, there was a lot to celebrate!

Given that we were still under the state’s no dancing policy, my husband confessed to me during the planning process that he would love a string quartet to play for the ceremony and the entire reception. We picked an eclectic list of music that ranged from Led Zeppelin and Bruce Springsteen to Backstreet Boys and Jason Mraz. It was this wonderful soothing music that everyone loved that you could recognize the tunes but still hear people speak! The only downfall was that my husband and I were so busy that we don’t recall hearing more than 2 minutes of it. I think I heard a tiny bit of the entrance music “I can’t help falling in love with you” and “Stairway To Heaven” during the reception.

Why did you choose your venue?
During my venue search, I had a few places in mind and had reached out to more venues than I could count. I had reached out to Meg during the first round of venues to inquire what their pricing package was for 2021 / 2022 weddings. My husband then announced to me that he really would prefer it if we didn’t wait long to get married. On a whim, I emailed Meg again and asked if she was doing any intimate wedding packages for 2020 – she replied and said, yes! She had two dates in October open and could we make it work? I told my husband that if I could find a wedding dress in time, that we would go for it. Because you know – priorities! And as you can see below, I did! Fiddler’s Elbow is for one, gorgeous. I love the stonework on their clubhouse for photos and their beautiful grounds. Meg’s service was above and beyond. She assured me that she had planned a wedding in two weeks and that seven weeks was no sweat. She even overcame her own discomfort to announce John and my entrance into the wedding as we didn’t have a DJ! Another thing that I think sets her apart from the rest is that she is always thinking ahead. She moved our ceremony flowers into the ballroom, so our sweetheart table looked even more lush. Our decorations that were at cocktail hour were moved to the bar. She reminded us to order invitations based on household, not guest (a mistake I was about to make). She proofed our invitations, because yes, I did get the year wrong. It’s the little touches that mean the most to us. And I think the craziest thing about our wedding was that despite being in the thick of a pandemic, Meg and her team made it so that we had the most normal wedding possible. She was an absolute dream to work with and welcomed us into the Fiddler’s Elbow family.

What was on your menu?
We both agreed that our favorite part of the wedding was deciding on food, cake, and our signature drinks. We were able to come up with a balance of having lots of options for cocktail hour while not being wasteful with an excessive amount of food. One of the nicest things about Fiddler’s Elbow was the ability for both of us to get ready at the clubhouse at a leisurely pace and enjoy our lunch from the Grill Room and cocktails from the bar with our families and bridal party. We opted for an upgraded cocktail hour with added buffet options. As it was still COVID restricted, our passed appetizers were served via buffet manned by Fiddler’s employees. Neia joined us on our cake tasting day and came up with our custom drinks.

As it was always my dream to get married in the fall because I love all pumpkin/apple-related activities, I was thrilled at the prospect of making a signature drink. Our rescue cat, named Prue, was the inspiration for both drinks. “Prue Love” was a warmed apple cider with house-made vanilla and cinnamon syrup served with a cinnamon stick (Rum was added for the adults). Neia nailed my request of “I want a warm hug of a drink”. And our other drink was “Prue-ly Now and Forever” which had Fiddler’s house-made gin, Primm’s No. 1, and house-made sour mix with tonic. John’s favorite part might have been the signature drink testing, but my favorite was the cake tasting. Chef spoiled us with so many different combinations of cake, filling, and icing. We sat there like a king and queen tasting on a beautiful fall afternoon. Ultimately we decided that our three-layer wedding cake would have the bottom two layers with chocolate mousse, vanilla cake alternated with cannoli filling. Our top layer was vanilla cake with lemon curd and fresh raspberries. The entire cake was iced in Chantilly cream. I was caught off guard when Chef asked what I wanted the cake to look like. They will go above and beyond and do whatever your heart desires. Needless to say – we devoured our top layer before leaving for our honeymoon. And we have no regrets. For dinner, John and I decided on the creamy vegetable risotto appetizer, artisanal greens salad, a choice of Chilean Sea Bass or Chateaubriand, and the wedding cake and various pastries. I recall walking out and grabbing a few pastries to go.

All about your gown!
I’m not quite sure how I stumbled upon this small curated dress shop, but I fell in love with Jessica Haley in Rye, NY via Instagram a long time ago. I knew I wanted to look classic but I also did not want to see my dress on 10 other brides. They also only offered private appointments which I appreciated having the store to myself. My mom was a bit more reserved and was cautious about driving 90 minutes to a dress shop that only carried a few brands. Amusingly, we chose our wedding date based upon my ability to find a dress. We walked into the store and told Haley “If we were to be married in 7 weeks, what could you get in time”. We started pulling gowns and trying them on. My mother (ever the rule-breaker) pulled a gown from a different rack and said “this is it”. It was the second gown I tried on and I instantly knew it was it. It was a beautiful custom Caroline Castigliano that Haley had customized herself. A classic fit and flare gown covered in French lace with a beautiful built-in corset. We changed out the grosgrain ribbon belt on the dress to a satin belt from my grandmother’s wedding gown for a personal touch. I wanted this dress to be something that my future daughter would admire and that we could use for her christening. Haley called the designer on her cell phone to ensure we could get it in time. It came in 4 weeks with time to spare.

That aspect was probably one of the most stressful situations. One – would it come on time? and two – would my made-to-measure dress fit once it got here? The only annoying part for us was that the Jessica Haley store doesn’t do alterations. So we had to find another bridal store, willing to take a bride who didn’t purchase through them. I was able to find a boutique in Montclair that also carried Caroline Castigliano and went to them. The seamstress was a nightmare. We gave her satin from my grandmother’s wedding dress to make the belt (I was trying to help my mom by eliminating one item from her list). But she stained the stain and said it was due to age. Despite the fact that my mom had already used the same fabric without any issue to make a jacket. She also messed up on the hemming of my dress which ended up being too long despite the fact that she hemmed it to the length of my shoes. It was a waste of $800 for minimal alterations but c’est la vie! Ironically, after making an appointment to preserve my dress, I found out we were expecting a baby girl so mom has now been commissioned for that christening dress!

What was your favorite moment?
We have two moments that are tied for first place. 1. Our first look – I’m not sure I could have handled seeing my husband for the first time walking down the aisle. I’m too much of an ugly crier! We did our first look before taking family photos and our ceremony. While it felt like a private moment, apparently the entire clubhouse was watching and cheering it unfold!!

2. We have 9 nieces and nephews between the two of us. During the wedding reception (which at the time did not allow dancing) the three little girls (two were my husband’s nieces and one was mine) were laughing and dancing in the middle of the dance floor to the string quartet. My husband and I did sneak onto the dance floor to dance “ring around the rosy” style with them. It was the most precious and innocent moment that never would have happened if it wasn’t COVID.

One detail you couldn’t live without?
All of the handmade aspects of the wedding

Did anything go wrong?
Outside of some family drama and blisters from wedding shoes… not much can come to mind! Although my mom just announced to me 8 months later that her wrist bracelet from the florist fell to pieces and my husband’s boutonniere didn’t survive long and he had to take his brothers! It is funny how no one wants to upset the bride on the day!

First dance song?
I prayed for you by Matt Stell

Any advice for future brides?
Break-in your shoes. My first dance was done in flip flops that my maid of honor had purchased for our spa day as my Jimmy’s chewed my feet to bits. Talk about a missed photo opportunity. Spring for the videographer – I was shocked at how much I missed just being in the moment. This is definitely a list of more than one. But, I made so many of the things myself and have them photographed as a memory, and yet… my husband and I only remember about 5 minutes of the string quartet. But ultimately, decide what you value the most and work backward.

Honeymoon Location
Sandals Grenada. Grenada was one of the few countries in October that had no COVID travel restriction and with a quick nose swab, we were on our way to paradise.

the details

Reception Location

Fiddler's Elbow Country Club

Photographer

Lauren Kearns Photography

Officiant

Fr. John Michael O Sullivan

Bride’s Gown

Caroline Castigliano

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Kaity and John at Fiddler’s Elbow Country Club

the details

Reception Location

Photographer

Officiant

Bride’s Gown

Bride’s Shoes

Bridesmaid Dresses

Hair

Makeup

Groom’s Attire

Flowers

Cake

Invites

Music

Videographer

Transportation

Brides Jewelry

Brides Accessories