Indian Weddings

“Indian weddings are family focused events that are extremely elaborate compared to American weddings,” says Toni DeLisi, owner of Memorable Events in Ramsey (201-934-9979; www.memorableevents.com.) DeLisi has coordinated a number of Indian weddings, including one for 650 guests that took place on a boat launched in Weehawken.

“There are many different religions in India, and the various states (there are 28 in all) have diverse languages, dress, and cultural heritages, with each family embracing certain elements of the old traditions,” says Rashi Shyam, founder of Haseen Events, an Indian wedding planning firm based in Cherry Hill (201-240-8689). One major Punjabi wedding tradition (that has permeated other regions and sects) is the Baraat—where the groom arrives at the ceremony on horseback, with several people dancing in front of him, along with his family and friends.

According to Shyam, the wedding festivities can begin on a Thursday night with a big party called a garba, where the women get mehndi (henna) applied to their hands and feet. On Friday there is another larger party, the sangeet (which used to be a rather raucous gathering for the more experienced women to sing explicit songs about married life) takes place. Today the sangeet is more akin to an engagement party, complete with invigorating music, food, and lots of dancing for a mixed crowd of men and women. For logistical reasons, the sangeet sometimes takes place the week before the wedding.

By the time Saturday rolls around, the dulhan (bride), the groom, and both sets of parents are ready with multiple changes of clothes for up to two different wedding ceremonies: one in traditional garb (a designer sari for the bride and a sherwani for the groom) and one in a modern wedding gown and a tux.

“The traditional Indian wedding is performed under a mandat, a four-to-six pole structure decorated with fabric and flowers,” says Howard Kramer, owner of Anderson Flowers, a floral design shop in Iselin (908-699-3732; www.andersonflowers.com) that has been creating festive floral decorations for Indian weddings in New Jersey and the metro New York area for more than 25 years. According to Kramer, traditional colors abound in the floral and fabric decorations for the ceremony, typically red and white or burgundy, gold, and ivory. Other traditions for the sangeet or garba parties include a huge floral pattern surrounding a tall statue in the middle of the room. “In” colors are hot pink, orange, and peacock blue, which are reflected in the floral decorations and fabric draped around the head table area. Because Indian weddings are typically for 250 or more people, the table decorations and wedding favors are generally low-key (western-style flower centerpieces and lottery tickets or small vases).